Welcome back! If you’ve made it to part three of “Be Fearless” then it’s safe to say that you’ve already checked out part 1 and part 2 right??? If not feel free to tap the links for each and check those out first. So, now that we’ve talked about the psychology of fear, and exploring our fear, let’s consider another angle…

Befriend Your Fear

Most of us would agree that fear does play a meaningful role in our lives. It helps us tune into when we may be in an unsafe situation, and can help protect us from harm. For that, we can thank fear for doing its job. But what if fear can do a few other useful things? As I continue to research, explore, and personally experience fear I become more and more aware of the purposeful role it can play in my life. Yes, fear can keep me safe from harm, but if I’m being honest, more often than not, a lot of the fear that I am facing comes from a less rational space. When I peel back the layers I am able to see that when my fear is irrational, it’s actually being driven by certain belief systems that I’ve developed, and through those belief systems I’ve learned to develop stories. So, if I choose to pay attention, and to explore my fear, it can actually help me uncover what those stories are, and how they may be holding me back in various areas of life. Let’s take my current example, teaching my first official paid gig as a yoga instructor. I mentioned one of the fears that came to mind was - “what if they hate it?”. As I dug deeper, I realized what I was really thinking was - “what if I’m not good enough?”. So now we’re on to something. I’ve danced in that space before. Admittedly, I’ve been prone to perfectionist behavior in the past (or present), and it has become a narrative in my life. But now that I’m paying attention to it, not only can I see how it’s held me back, I get the opportunity to change my future approach. For that, I am grateful.

Another thing I believe we can thank fear for is helping us show up in a better way. Because I was anxious about teaching I became even more focused on building the most effective yoga flows that I could. I practiced the routine with others, on my own, and even went through them in my head while driving. I did not want to let myself down, let alone others. So fear moved me to action, it extended a challenge to me that said “if you don’t want them to hate it, then show up prepared to do your best”. In that sense I was able to study and prepare and show up. And going back to what I mentioned last week, at that point I could set the fear aside because I knew I truly had done my best. However, that also required me to discard expectations of being perfect. I believe even those that are the best at what they do, from MJ to Serena, Simone to Allyson have felt (and maybe still) feel fear, but they use it to propel them forward, rather than hold them back. So, what will you conquer next?
Speaking of, join me next week when we talk about conquering your fears.

Namaste…